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Seven things which are very disturbing about this photo of Louis van Gaal

A photograph has re emerged, so compelling and harrowing in equal measure, that we cannot quite fathom its existence.

The photograph depicts Manchester United manager, Louis van Gaal, alongside his fellow countryman, Dick Advocaat, whilst the two were managers of PSV and Ajax respectively.

The pair will meet again this weekend when United play host to Sunderland on Saturday, but we're unsure if we'll ever be able to get this surreal image out of our head.

Here's everything that's so wrong with it.

Louis van Gaal dressed like a no nonsense bank clerk

It's unsurprising that both Advocaat and van Gaal's get up smacks of long outdated fashion but more than that, Dick Advocaat has the look of a world weary bank manager given one more lease of life by the prospect of training up his young and ambitious protege bank clerk: Louis van Gaal.

Dick Advocaat's miracle growthArguably the most baffling aspect of the photo is the extent to which the Sunderland manager seems to have recovered his hairline. In the ensuing years since the photograph van arpels and cleef necklace knock off was taken, Advocaat has defied medical science and re grown his fading locks.

The decor

The photo seems to be set on top of a crumpled bed sheet

The set design is almost as disturbing as the models featured in it. Velvet grey for a photoshoot? Amateur.

The 'shorts'

Shorts Sepp Blatter would be proud of

We're constantly being reminded by old professionals that 'shorts used to be shorts', and this photograph indeed confirms that length of short on prior to today's overly endorsed footballers was criminally short. Look at them, they're practically non existent. oh, wait.

The distressed models

The thousand yard stare

We can't help but feel slightly troubled by the visage of both women their expressions betray a traumatic past we can copy vca necklace only imagine that, or they've just been told they'll one day join Advocaat in Sunderland.

The stray hand

Louis van Gaal's hand surveys the scene

We're sure it's inadvertent but Louis van Gaal's hand is straying dangerously close to turning the photo shoot into an x rated scene.

Oh. and the sexism

It is isn't it? We're all agreed imitation van cleef and arpel clover necklace on that. Whilst the painstaking effort to spray paint the entirety of both women just to offer some mild titillation is admirable, it's definitely not acceptable. Fine, let's move on.

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